Monthly Archives: April 2013

An apple a day doesn’t do $#!+.

As the old adage goes, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away.” Well, not for babies who have checkups scheduled for what seems like every other day for the first two years of their lives. Can we just set … Continue reading

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I have a problem.

Hi. I’m Nell. And I’m a germophobe. Hi Nelllll, repeat all the sad-sack germophobes in unison as they each squirt a lake of antibacterial soap from their pocket into their clammy palms, vigorously rubbing them together like praying mantis with Tourettes. … Continue reading

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You are the company you keep. But I’m not.

Why do I always find myself in conversations, and worse, agreeing, with crazy people? At the grocery store the other day, an unkempt-looking woman sidled up next to me in the produce section. (Keep in mind this is coming from … Continue reading

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Eenie. Meenie. Minie. Mo. Catch a [mommy] tiger by her toe[nail].

As a mom, personal hygiene goes out the window. There’s not enough time, that’s all there is to it. My most recent example of this? My big toe toenail is so long Kellan tripped on it the other day and … Continue reading

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31 is hotter than 21.

I’m 31 today. And, actually, it feels gooood. Believe it or not, I’d rather be 31 than 21 any day. Now I shall gush all over the “why”s. This could get mushy. Atencion: Piso mojado. I’m in the best shape … Continue reading

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Put my parents on your do not call list.

I love my parents and I’m grateful for all they do for Tim and me, especially in terms of watching Baby Kellan. But here’s the thing. My parents’ home phone rings incessantly when Kellan goes down for a nap. I’d … Continue reading

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This one’s for Alfredo. Fettucine Alfredo.

IT’S BIRTHDAAAAY MONNNNTH! So. I don’t know. Let’s talk about, say, ME. Here’s a quickie for you. A fun fact. A tid bit about this nit wit. When I’m out at a restaurant and I eat too much, I bloat. … Continue reading

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